This is a witty title, pregnant with meaning and suspense.

Ukraine's Got Talent

Fri, 03 Jul 2009 20:51:18 GMT

The voiceovers in the video start off by announcement of the war (the hollow voice over the bench couple); then a ballad about the kid sleeping at home while the bullets whistle in the fields. After the musical interlude it is another Russian song about those who didn't return (the lyrics are along the lines of - those who did not return are only left as voices of the birds in the fields; and that is the reason we are often silent when looking into the skies).

The last musical interlude (as mentioned above) is over the text "You're always near" (Can be also translated as "you are always close [to me]").

The general storyline of the men who were lost in war touches most born in ex-Soviet countries - each family has a war story; everyone lost someone. Soviet Union had the most military and total casualties in that war. - olya

More one and two.

I had to.

Fri, 26 Jun 2009 02:20:58 GMT

Fri, 12 Jun 2009 20:25:12 GMT

Thu, 11 Jun 2009 12:20:04 GMT

2009

2003

1936

om nom nom

Fri, 05 Jun 2009 17:05:13 GMT

HAPPY HOLOCAUST DAY

Wed, 22 Apr 2009 02:47:32 GMT

In these hard economic times, I give myself a hurrcut.

Mon, 13 Apr 2009 11:25:21 GMT

Fri, 06 Mar 2009 20:00:37 GMT

So the sensation of a hypodermic needle scraping across the inner parts of your vertebrae is pretty unpleasant. Like really super-duper pretty unpleasant.

Also, a thing a doctor said that I am glad was not directed to me: "Well, there was a lot of pus in there, but we got most of it out for you."

Wed, 04 Mar 2009 21:37:02 GMT

CRAWLING IN MY SKIN

Thu, 05 Feb 2009 03:25:33 GMT

All over my arms, my chest, and my back. I've changed shirts, but the one I was wearing pre-breakout (yesterday and last night) and the one I was wearing during this mess both came out of the wash at the same time, and neither has ever given me problems before. Listening to Christan Bale is distracting me from it, though.

I cut my hand on pasta sauce earlier.

Fri, 23 Jan 2009 05:24:43 GMT

If you pop you might stop.

Thu, 01 Jan 2009 05:13:41 GMT

Sun, 28 Dec 2008 21:05:14 GMT

Bill Nye can recite the last thousand digits of pi.

Bill Nye is the only person who is allowed in the lab area without goggles.

Bill Nye told Pluto that it was no longer a planet... and it listened.

Bill Nye blinded Thomas Dolby with science.

The reason light is so fast is because it's running away from Bill Nye.

'strue, y'onor.

Duk soup.

Tue, 23 Dec 2008 05:53:09 GMT

Duk soup is something of a ferret tradition. You make it for your ailing fuzzbutts, when they can't manage solid food, or when you want to put some meat on the bones of a rescued ferret, or just because, since they love it. Ferret communities have lists of suggested recipes, and each owner has their own personal style. Since I hadn't made it before, and I had the ingredients (ferret kibble, chicken breasts, eggs (yolk, white, and crushed shells), ferret vitamin supplement, and some other stuff I'm forgetting) and some time, I whipped up a batch a couple weeks ago.

They say ferrets love the stuff, and they do. What they don't say is how horrendous it smells as you're making it:

Step 1, mix everything up and boil it down. This is the smelliest segment, and also the longest.

Leftovers get frozen for later. Ice cube trays are the preferred method for this.

Yes, it does look like poo. No, it is not poo.

Duk Pâté. Bon appetit! Où est mon brosse à dents? Foux da fa fa! Bonjour?

Do not know if want...

A different perspective.

OH HAY IS DAT A CAMERA CAN I SEE PLEEZ

They didn't eat much on camera, but by the next day half of that dish (which normally holds 4-5 days worth of food) was gone.

I think they likes it.

They're coming to take me away, ha-ha...

Sun, 21 Dec 2008 14:45:16 GMT

Tue, 09 Dec 2008 23:24:40 GMT

Sat, 06 Dec 2008 19:53:06 GMT

STOP POKING ME

NONSENSICAL STATEMENT INVOLVING PLANKTON

Wed, 05 Nov 2008 20:17:25 GMT

Obligatory "we mostly kinda sorta won except for that stupid California thing" post.

Tue, 04 Nov 2008 17:09:15 GMT

Not far now...

Thu, 23 Oct 2008 05:40:08 GMT

A couple weeks ago I was part of the Chicago MP3 Experiment, run by Improv Everywhere. They uploaded pictures and video of the thingy over the weekend, which you can see here. If you see a doofus in a red shirt who looks like an idiot because they forgot their headphones (and was luckily able to borrow an extra pair off another participant) and their umbrella (so had to use the umbrella-less umbrella pole/stick/thing they had in their car for some reason)... that's not me.

I swear.

Fri, 10 Oct 2008 17:40:01 GMT

What does it mean when you have a nightmare where you've moved out of your apartment, but nobody told the new residents that they need to put a towel down by the toilet to soak up the slow leak that the landlord is too busy to fix, and a week later the slow leak turns into a puddle a foot wide and gets the rug by the sink wet?

This one has been going around.

Fri, 19 Sep 2008 06:41:16 GMT

Take a picture of yourself right now.
Don’t change your clothes, don't fix your hair.
Just take the picture.
Post the picture with no editing.
Post these instructions with your picture.

Thu, 11 Sep 2008 12:31:34 GMT

My roommate just went into a violent seizure, luckily waking (and scaring the shit out of) me up as he did so, and boy are my arms tired! Hey-o!

Thank you, thank you, I'll be here all week! Try the veal.

Er, yeah.

So the head injury from two years ago that I didn't know about intersected with the cough syrup dependency he told me was behind him, and I got to watch him twitch from the desk chair to the floor like a largish carp. I consider the speaking in tongues and Macarena dance moves a bonus. I needed to wake up early anyway, and this gives me a chance to write the post I didn't have time to do yesterday.

Excepting today's time aberration, the last several Wednesdays have been eventful, or at least notable:

Four Wednesdays ago, I had just gotten a prescription for a new medication to help me sleep. I took one, didn't expect it to work so quickly, and the in the resultant goofiness I ended up spilling some water on my laptop. I don't remember much, but the next morning I had a dead computer. Woo!

Three Wednesdays ago, I was driving to one of my stops and came upon a man lying in the street. At first I thought he was a cow, or at least a calf, but that couldn't be right, since how many cows live in downtown Chicago? Don't answer that. It was on this curvy semi-underground divided highway, and he had stepped down from a break in the lane division on the blind side of a curve at just the wrong time.

He had half a head of dreadlocks, a big brand-new bag of popcorn he wasn't going to be able to eat, and was wearing dirty sneakers with no socks. He had a white T-shirt on with a tire track over the left shoulder. I couldn't see the left side of his head pressed to the asphalt, but he had a felt patch over his right eye. The only blood I could see dribbled from his mouth.

The guy who hit him had already stopped ahead, and I parked too. I called 911 to find that someone had already reported the accident - someone was on their way. He was alive, but all I could determine was that he could feel his fingers, responding with tiny nods. One other lady stopped behind us, and was very excited to tell the firemen who arrived next that she thought he was blind.

I wasn't directly involved, no info was needed from me, so I left. Half a mile later the gawkers had forgotten about him. Two miles later as I got off the freeway, I ignored another homeless guy who was begging at the exit. My change had already gone into a parking meter a day or three before, and my heart had already resteeled itself.

Two Wednesdays ago, I watched a man running down the sidewalk. He didn't seem to want his arms or legs to drop behind the plane of his body, which was interesting to watch and must have been quite a feat for him.

Last Wednesday, I found out that the guy who was fixing my laptop had gotten into a car accident of his own. Discs and wrists and ligaments. I told him I knew the feeling, but I don't know if he believed me, and I didn't elaborate. Later on, not far from where the popcorn man had been, I saw a taxi that had veered into the bones of a bridge and spun around 180 degrees. The right corner of his hood was peeled back across the passenger door, apparently for the viewing convenience of we passing folk in the other lane. Another enterprising cab driver was already picking up the unlucky one's fare.

Yesterday, not much. Time aberration, yeah yeah?

Tue, 05 Aug 2008 15:00:47 GMT

- Operation Make A Lot Of Noise And Poop Out Some Kittens is a success as of whenever. There are six kittens total, broken down into an indeterminate number of males and females, which shall be determined and maybe even named once I'm allowed to pick up said kittens without mommy claws entering the picture. Pictures have been taken, and will be posted once the crisis described below has been resolved.

- This evening Chicago has been enveloped in a massive thunderstorm, which currently looks like a giant dildo fucking the vicinity. This was great when I was finishing up the last part of my route, three miles from home, because the multiple lightning strikes every second were totally awesome to watch, and the ~10' visibility with rain alone was truly an adventure for these modern times. Me being me, I reported all three trees I found that had fallen over the roadway to 911, one of which you might hear in the forthcoming video (or might not, I haven't watched it yet to see it if it's palatable).

- Speaking of rain, I thought the fairly recent improvements to la casa would prevent the floodedness that has plagued said casa would, y'know, prevent floody stuff. Once the crazy rain got to this area, though it took no prisoners. The ferrets are one reason to keep nothing important at floor level, and this is another. Everything is a mess, and the power has been out for about twelve hours now. It'll all be cleaned up eventually, but for now it all reeks of flood stink.

- Speaking of sucky stuff, there's a gas leak that cropped up overnight. The workers who have been cutting holes in the wall say they doubt it's related to the storm, so I'm chalking it up to my bi-weekly Bad Shit Event, except it's a double this time. I'm overdue, but at least this time it's not directly costing me any money.

Sat, 02 Aug 2008 03:59:35 GMT